The Power of a Piggyback Ride

October 2018 was my first time visiting the orphanage. I had spent the past two months planning my trip-- it would be my first time to India and the orphanage-- and it still did not prepare me for the change I would soon undergo. I've always disagreed with going to volunteer just to change your own life; it is too focused on our own needs and expectations of having a"cool experience". Serving the boys, instead, no matter how hard you try to focus on them, will soften the hardest heart. It will change you just like it changed me.

The moment I reached the front gate, I was greeted by beaming eyes and bright smiles. The boys, varying in age, grabbed my arms and pulled me into their world. I had no time to adjust to language or unpack my bags before I was playing a game of Kabaddi, a tag-style game which is a favorite of the boys. In retrospect, I wonder if I appeared nervous to the boys. I'm often too focused on first impressions. If they noticed, it didn't stop them from giving me a personal tour of their home. They fought over who would show me what secret place or their favorite book, or their personal trunk. I've always been considered a wildly energetic person, but the boys were on another level of energy. They fill every moment with love, and they unknowingly tackle you into loving them (literally).

The second day of the orphanage, we were presented by the staff various ways that we could contribute to the orphanage financially. It ranged from building a fence to purchasing hot water heaters. If you have ever been in a similar situation, you know how stressful it can be. There are so many areas of need and with so little resources and time readily available. You can only do so much, or so I thought.

It didn't take long for me to debunk my fears of being unhelpful. Money is a useful and important resource because of the opportunities and infrastructure it can provide those in need. However money impacts a life far less than a piggyback ride can. When the boys jump on your back and you run and spin around for hours on end, there is no amount of money in the world that can replace the love they feel. Giving them hugs when they are crying, holding their hand as we walk to the some locality, or letting them fall asleep on your lap on a tuk-tuk ride are all seemingly small actions. However these moments of connection with the boys reinforce a feeling within them: I am loved. Love is an emotion we easily take for granted, especially when we are afforded the emotion constantly through our parents, siblings, significant others, and spiritual brothers and siblings. The boys don't have the same luxury. They have their caretakers and each other. You realize quickly that you become more a parent than a volunteer. You play with them and you help them with their homework. You break up fights and you discipline them. You wipe their tears and dress their wounds. You love them and within a few hours you feel a though they are your own and you would give them the world.

I no longer think of service in the same way. I thought my best was to give the most money and resources as possible. Now I realize that taking time to engage and love deeply is where the real power lies. To let a person know they are cared for, they are loved and that you believe in them, can completely change the way a person views themselves and the world. It doesn't require language, it requires love. I look forward to my next trip to see the boys because I owe all of them another piggyback ride.